Couples who have difficulty getting pregnant need empathy: just like any other person receiving medical treatment
When the baby doesn’t arrive, there is nothing that makes you feel worse than having to hear the phrase “It’s just your imagination!” Or “You shouldn’t dwell on it so long!”. The person who hears it assumes that, besides having fertility problems, she also has a psychological impediment, which reinforces her isolation and prevents her from lightening her suffering. Self-esteem also plays a key role in this process, and what a woman undergoing treatment needs to hear is that she is a fighter, and that she will of course achieve her goal.
Women who undergo an assisted reproduction treatment are courageous, persevering women bursting with indescribable strength. Couples who have difficulty getting pregnant need empathy. They need others to put themselves in their shoes, just like any other person receiving medical treatment. Surely no one would think of telling a diabetic that he or she thinks too much about insulin and for this reason has become resistant to it! Also, when the cause of infertility lies with the man, is it just his imagination? Pregnancy doesn’t come because he thinks too much about his sperm? If so, what would be the sense of prescribing contraceptives if you just need to think about it in order not get pregnant? Let’s be serious, please. There are multiple causes of infertility, some of which have an explanation and others which don’t; regarding the latter, they are said to be idiopathic, in other words, with no known origin, which does not mean that they are psychological. Infertility is, above all, a medical problem.
There is no point in apportioning blame if we hear the annoying phrase: it is totally normal to think about it. When it is necessary to use the help of professionals to conceive a child, when you have several appointments a month with the gynaecologist, when we have to give ourselves injections on a daily basis, or in a short time we are going to be anaesthetized for a follicular puncture, how can we not think about it and become stressed? These techniques are invasive, stressful and complex. The situation in which one finds oneself isn’t easy, and the patterns of one’s life are being reshaped. It is simply impossible not to get it out of your head!
However, we know that the body and mind are closely linked. The mind acts on the body, and it is well-known that it is capable of altering its balance in such a way that stress or mental blockages could theoretically make a pregnancy difficult. In order to conceive a child, the body needs to function well, as well needing a favorable psychological and emotional framework. If one feels well, it will not be necessary to start therapy; On the other hand, if all this seems insurmountable, and there is continued suffering, perhaps it would be interesting to go to a professional. It will just take a few sessions to make you feel better.
No more complexes! And turn a deaf ear to these thoughts!